October (seems like ages ago)
When the sun is not shining on her
Write her a love song and play it all day long
To remind her of all that she is worth
Never never leave her
Take her on long drives for ice-cream by sea sides
And give her your coat when she is cold
Tell her you miss her when you're close enough to kiss her
And that you'd walk a thousand miles to tell her so
But never never leave her
Take photographs of her on Brooklyn street in October
When her nervous smile is slightly curved
Some days when she is slightly down tell her it's okay to frown
It makes you just fall more in love with her
But never never leave her
- rosie thomas
there seems to be something missing in my life but i cant figure out if it's rescuing me from the invisible or it's killing me (bit by bit).
today, i was a wreck. And, i made two wishes.
0 comments
i saw Sam on Tues. this time, i didnt feel that undesirable feeling as i did the last time. and i'm more than glad.
what i did this week during the break after the exams..
monday,
Tuesday,
look at those awful eyebags. and those are my shoes with Des next to me. talk abt randomness.
wednesday was the day we reluctantly trudged the pathways of Potong Pasir. i was glad to see Ram's encouraging "Up & On" but at the same time, was commented on as "cynical", "sappy" and "pedantic" on another paper.
Saturday was lovely, despite having to make my way unwillingly to Swensons at Chinatown to collect the icecream mooncakes. Bad service aside, it was enticing just going through the many flavours(Macadamia Nut, Chewy Chocolate, Vanilla etc etc) that they have. after getting home and fooling around with the dry ice, i went down to town, dragged him shopping, made my first visit to Crystal Jade, got my caffeine from Coffee Bean at Scotts and finally, satisfied my perennial cravings for YAMI yoghurt's banana boat(again).
Lester prank called me, exclaiming he's the enunch i've mail ordered from China and how we've had a great time. i reminded him, enunches cant have good times. not in the way i defined his "great time".
i wish days would repeat themselves
i suppose i just need assurance; someone who would spend time with me and tell me it was lovely.
0 comments
When I am dead, my dearest,
Sing no sad songs for me;
Plant thou no roses at my head,
Nor shady cypress tree:
Be the green grass above me
With showers and dewdrops wet;
And if thou wilt, remember,
And if thou wilt, forget.
I shall not see the shadows,
I shall not feel the rain;
I shall not hear the nightingale
Sing on, as if in pain:
And dreaming through the twilight
That doth not rise nor set,
Haply I may remember,
And haply may forget.
if u have time, read this
0 comments
Two of us wearing raincoats
Standing solo in the sun
you joined in the lament, moping that you're not loved.
then you realize, you took more than you gave. you never really showed how much you loved him.
have you ever gone out of the way and done something quite out of your nature for him? have you ever brought him coffee when he's having his exams or made him honey when he's having a sore throat? gave him a massage when he's tired? remembered his favourite food? or made him cookies on the pretext that u're making them for your friends because you're afraid to tell him the truth so that he wouldnt think you're madly in love with him?
were you afraid to say "I love you"? because you were afraid that he might not feel the same?
perhaps we all were.
0 comments
who wants to live forever?
like Queen's song,
There's no time for us
There's no place for us
What is this thing that builds our dreams yet slips away
From us
Who wants to live forever
Who wants to live forever?
There's no chance for us
It's all decided for us
This world has only one sweet moment set aside for us
Who wants to live forever
Who wants to live forever?
Who dares to love forever?
When love must die
But touch my tears with your lips
Touch my world with your fingertips
And we can have forever
And we can love forever
Forever is our today
Who wants to live forever
Who wants to live forever?
Forever is our today
Who waits forever anyway?
- it's when u learn to cherish things today that it lives in your heart forever.
i am learning now, as of this moment, spending time with the people i love. yesterday was spent shopping.
monday will be the time we gorge ourselves with good food, good company and great conversations, tuesdays would be with the girls if nothing goes wrong. and next week, i might just meet my chen xiao xuan who will take some time off from her busy schedule for me.
0 comments
A Face by the Window
I love you, the grey face in the grey
window of the coffee house - the face
with expectations.-
In the age of broken spears, ships,
masts - the heart full of
arrows - grey apathy in the eyes,
you would know: It spills
over us like a cascade of light
from the sky.
We will be able to look at
the swaying of the green seas
and see terrifying whirlpools,
sailors on masts,
without nervousnes.
- Slovenian magic (my new love, for a love that's past)
0 comments
isnt that a reflection of life? for something to cause you sadness, you have to know what is happiness and to truly appreciate happiness, you have to had gone through some hard times. i think i'm in transit.
0 comments
The Fountain of Immortality
Will you deliver this bane from bondage?
Take this ring, it's a symbol of your pledge to find the elixir of mortality.
You shall wear it when you find Eden. And when you return, I shall be your Eve.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
I Hate Love
"Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life... You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love."
-Neil Gaiman. (i wonder when he said that, since he's now married with kids)
Des found this. and yes, it does remind all of us we're not insane. we're just unrepentant and maybe a little too inclined towards sadistic tendencies, allowing someone else to do the job of cutting us up.
0 comments
dreaming of things that are lost.
i didnt want to blog about this pathetic period of most young adults' lives cause i know how much everyone hates it. well, i've come to a conclusion that i need to do a lot of mugging - whether smartly or blindly. just mug. i'm sure it will pay off, somehow. (just like our closet muggers, we gotta learn from them).
0 comments
life is short
this is written by Ernest Christopher Dowson, who by some chance has the same birthday as me. and this poem, was said to be written about a 12 year old girl whom he was wildly in love with. he was 24 years old then and alas, the love was unrequited. he died of alcoholism or perhaps tuberculosis, at 32.
another lovely piece by him :
They are not long, the weeping and the laughter,
Love and desire and hate:
I think they have no portion in us after
We pass the gate.
They are not long, the days of wine and roses:
Out of a misty dream
Our path emerges for a while, then closes
Within a dream.
-Vitae Summa Brevis Spem Nos Vetat Incohare Longam
0 comments
belle & sebastian - Marx and Engels
0 comments
zh called and we talked til 2. followed by C. who called after that.. we chatted til daybreak, almost 6, catching up for the past few months that we havent seen each other. we could have gone on talking, if not for my dad who came over. we talked about school, family, and everything that has been happening in our lives and even those that happened before but we missed out on our past conversations.
he asked if i would go to his wedding if he was to get married and i said of course i would and he better invite me or i'd be mad. then he asked what if i'm the one he marries. i told him that is a silly thought.
when we hung up, i told him i'd love to marry him.
i'm glad he called cause i did miss him.
0 comments